Dave Proctor 
Reluctant Allotmenteer 

This book tells the tales of Percy, an allotmenteer, who hated gardening. The mere thought of all that wallowing around in mud and manure simply revulsed him.But he enjoyed the peace and tranquillity an allotment could bring, something he could never find at home with his ever-demanding wife and their two teenage daughters, who regarded him as less of a father and more as a cash dispenser.For Percy, his idea of heaven comprised of a deckchair and a glass of a nice homemade fruit wine.At the allotment, you will meet Horatio Dodds, President of the Allotment Society and pedant extraordinaire; his ever-demanding wife, Clementine, a formidable lady with the voice of a cat on heat being attacked by a rabid dog; and Michael, a man so boring he could cure the worst case of insomnia in a trice, together with the other allotmenteers of the Birchford Allotment Society.